So you want to change?

I have been stuck at various times in my Christian walk wishing that I could change. In fact, one thing that I am having to deal with right now is pride. When someone asks me to do something that I am capable of doing, my heart gets puffed up. It is one of the most frustrating things that can happen. I don't want it to happen.

Another thing that haunts me is the waveriness of my faith. Don't get me wrong, He is there, I just end up feel like I am talking to the ceiling sometimes. Even when I worship sometimes it just feels like I am singing songs, even if it is a time when I am worshipping on my own.

I was thinking about this today when I felt God remind me that if I would just spend time in His presence, He would help me. You see. One of the things that I have found is that I cannot change myself. I do not have the power. That is why I can hate being prideful and yet have my heart exult itself under my breath. It is the most frustrating part of our walk as Christians (well at least to me) to want to do what is right and then to find your own heart and emotions and desires betraying that very thing you want to do and know that you should do. So what can we do?

Spend time with God. It is He that changes us on the inside. You are dealing with pride? Porn? Drugs? Selfishness? Anger? Spend time in God's presence. I think that the more time we spend in God's presence the more He changes us. I believe He uses the time we spend with Him as an opportunity to move in our hearts and conform us to be more like Him. How dangerous it is for us Christians to not spend time with Him because, at least in my experience, we just fall back into the places that we were before He came and started changing our hearts.

Spend time with God. Dig in the Word. Pray. It may seem hopeless or as if nothing is getting done. It may seem like you are talking to a wall. It may seem like the words just run through your eyes without ever getting to your heart. But keep going. It takes a while to scrub away at that calloused shell that encases our hearts. Of course, maybe God will break through and give it instantly. He can. But don't be disappointed if He doesn't. We in our American mindset like to have things quick and easy. We like to have our dinners on our plates within 2 minutes or less. (and we certainly don't want to have to bother with cleaning up afterward... ok, so maybe that's me :-/) Point is, we want things easy. Well, life isn't easy and it isn't quick. This thing we call the Christian walk isn't easy and it sure isn't quick. It takes time to grow. (Like I said, God can do whatever he wants... he can do it quick. And maybe He will. But just be patient if He doesn't)